Why I Believe in Youth Ministry

Over the past month, I've had some difficult and sometimes disheartening conversations about the ineffectiveness of programs (specifically youth and children's programs) in our churches today. Then today, I read this article (http://thegospelside.com/2012/09/23/whats-so-uncool-about-cool-churches/), which i had read in the past, but which currently takes on new significance. Consequently, I have begun to look back on my personal experiences with these programs (both as a participant and a leader) and have come to the conclusion that, yes, many churches today are losing young people to the secular world. However, I don't necessarily believe that segregation of youth are to blame.

I chose the aforementioned article because it makes seemingly valid arguments, but I believe these arguments are inherently flawed. For example:

1. 20-30 year olds attend church at 1/2 the rate of their parents and ¼ the rate of their grandparents. 

While the author states this as evidence that youth segregation is failing the church, I see it as evidence that the church is failing as a whole. By these statistics, although we are attending church at only 1/2 the rate of our parents, our parents themselves only attend church at 1/2 the rate of their parents. Most of our parents were raised up in the church long before the current segregation of youth trend began. This means that something was failing in the church long before youth were pulled out to worship/learn separately from adults.

2. 61% of churched high school students graduate and never go back! (Time Magazine, 2009) Even worse: 78%  to 88% of those in youth programs today will leave church, most to never return. (Lifeway, 2010)

These statistics may be true, but there is no support for the conclusion drawn from them: "attending a church with nothing seems to be more effective at retaining youth than our youth programs." The author shows no evidence that youth from small country churches without organized youth programs are attending church on into adulthood.

So, if it isn't segregation of youth, what is causing a large number of youth to leave the church? I believe that 2 things are responsible: a cultural shift and a lack of fervent faith and discipleship amongst churchgoers. My grandparents are baby-boomers. People of their generations were raised differently. I have heard people from that age group talk about waiting to have sex until marriage not because of a conviction from God to keep oneself pure, but because "that was how things were done". I suspect that many a churchgoer from that era attended church for the same reason. Our grandparents were raised as moralists, and, in those days, having morals meant attending church. While it is possible to be a moral person without being Christian, it is impossible to have a personal relationship with God without having ones moral attitude affected. Culture has become increasingly more tolerant of sin and less tolerant of any attempts at restraint or denying oneself. These shifts go against the very grain of Christianity. Teens often use the excuse, "I want to be free to do what I want. No one can tell me what to do." They reject Christianity because of the perceived bondage (don't get drunk, don't do drugs, don't have sex outside of marriage) and run toward their perceived freedom - all the while missing the true freedom that comes with self-restraint (i.e. - having control of ones body, not having to worry about being pregnant or getting an STD). Therefore, young people view Christianity as antiquated and irrelevant and see no need to delve deeper into scripture and discover a lasting and life-altering faith.

This lasting and life-altering faith is exactly what is missing in the life of many churchgoers - not just the young people. We are failing to disciple young people because we don't have a base from which to disciple - a lived-out, sold-out, commitment to God. The view that youth are always looking for something fun and entertaining is completely false. Youth have an uncanny ability to discern truth and what they are looking for is something real. They are looking for an adult who can recognize their individual struggles and who can show them how to "work out their own salvation with fear and trembling". The Bible does not need to be "made relevant" for youth. Christ is ALWAYS relevant, but youth need to be shown how to discern that for themselves - how to read the Bible and apply it to their lives in a way that it makes an impact. This is a learned skill and one that too few adults have. Too many adults are consumers in church - worried only about what they can get from the sermon, from the music, from the programs. Too few are worried about what they can give - to God, to the church, to their community. It is important to allow those who are gifted at ministering to youth (and children) a time and place to cultivate relationships through which to minister more effectively to youth. I do believe that there is a time for corporate worship (from ages 2 months to 102 years), but I also believe that it is beneficial to our children/youth to be broken into smaller groups in order for them to have time to discuss topics that are pressing to them.

So what can we as a church do to retain our young people after they grow up? The main thing that we can do is to make youth ministry relational and Spirit focused. There is nothing wrong with having pizza socials, youth ski trips, and capture the flag tournaments. All of these activities help the youth to build solid relationships with each other and with adult youth workers. However, this should not be the basis of our youth groups and entertainment/fellowship should not be the primary goal. Mentoring kids and directing them to a meaningful relationship with Christ should always be the primary goal. Can this goal be assisted by youth rallies that appear to outsiders to look like rock concerts? Absolutely. Just because its mainstream and accepted doesn't mean that it's ungodly. Another way that we can retain young people in the church is by showing them what it means to be dedicated followers of Christ. Young people who see Christ having an impact in the lives of their parents, teachers, and other adults at their churches are likely to possess a deeper understanding of what a relationship with Christ entails.  Don't just take your kids to church, worship and serve together as a family. Be transparent with your teenagers and reveal to them a little about your own struggles and how Christ helps you in your daily walk. Pretty soon, they'll be standing at the threshold into adulthood and instead of abandoning religion to their newfound "freedom", they'll be running toward the One who offers true freedom.